This movie came out 6 months ago in America. If it did open up in Australia in the same month, it's likely it would have been overshadowed by all the big blockbuster winter releases. Now, I'm not usually a fan of horror movies due to the ludicrously farfetched concepts (they only work well in science fiction), the boring, one-sided characters and the pathetically generic plot every friggin one of those atrocities has (you know the one, 4-7 friends/acquaintances all go together to a deserted, foreign location where either a carnivorous, alien creature or a mentally-abused retard with a deformed face [and a tendency of killing people] offs each character one by one until the protagonist and perhaps his/her lover face the aforementioned homicidal "creature" in a big showdown, usually with a lame-ass twist such as "the alien creature(s) gave birth to eggs before they died!" or "it was all a dream...or was it?!"), but I decided to check this one out purely because I have enjoyed some of Cusack's past works and it looked to be more of a thriller than a generic horror movie, with an actual unique plot!! I figured "evil room, this should be interesting. Let's give it a go!"
Unfortunately, this movie wasn't half as thrilling as it should have been and the novelty of the "evil room" concept fell apart around 45 minutes into the movie. Keep in mind Cusack didn't actually check into the room until around 30 minutes into the movie. The first 30 minutes of the movie are the equivalent of the first 6 episodes of Buffy's season 4, i.e. the most pathetic, boring, lame-ass shite I have had the misfortune to watch in a long time. They could have easily cut down explaining the story of Cusack's pessimistic view of the world and his joy in shattering anything and everything others around him believed in by 20 minutes, but they had to draw it out for as long as possible. It felt as if Cusack was stuck in the room already, and he hadn't even heard about it yet.
When Cusack finally got around to entering the room, things started to look up, but they fell apart rather quickly. It may add to the "thrills", "suspense", or dare I say "horror" (although only a 12 year old would find this movie "horrifying"), but when you have a protagonist facing an unknown foe, it may start off interesting, but it rapidly and surely becomes a thrill-less, horrifically annoying concept. It was hinted at that the hotel's staff and the manager (played by Samuel L. Jackson) were in on the whole thing and they amused themselves from it somehow (such as the discovery of the invisible spy cam in the air ducts by Cusack halfway through the movie), but in the end there was really no tangible villain, and it just felt as if we were watching Cusack suffer all this ludicrously unrealistic crap for absolutely no reason at all.
Don't get me wrong, none of the audience felt any sympathy at all for Cusack as he went from pessimistic, arrogant douchewad to a terrified, confused mess in less than an hour. In fact, many members of the audience laughed at his misfortunes. Was it because the human race is becoming consecutively colder and harder towards other peoples' suffering? Perhaps, but it's more likely because the whole thing was seen for what it was...predictable. The whole thing was just extremely predictable, and that is the main thing that led this movie into an awkward limbo between tolerable and mediocre. Besides the whole "evil room" novelty which wore off long before the movie milked the concept for all it was worth, that is.
Come on, people. It was extremely obvious that Cusack's whole vision of "Oh, it was all a dream, I hit my head on my surfboard when I was surfing on the beach and I've been in a hospital bed in California this whole time" was fake, and that his brief escapade outside 1408 was really the dream. It was also extremely obvious that his daughter would die in his arms mere moments after she returned to him. Everything was just so obvious! Cusack sticks his head out the window, and the window slams down on his hand. Cusack climbs out the window to reach the window of one of the 14th floor rooms, and all of the other windows magically disappear. Cusack stares at a painting of men on a ship, and suddenly the room is flooded with kilolitres of water. Why so obvious?!?! It was so obvious, it was funny. When his daughter randomly fell limp into his arms, it was funny. When he woke up back in the room and screamed "NO!!! I WAS OUT!!11", that was funny. And that, dear readers, is why it was funny.
But apart from all this, the movie did have its moments. Katie's body suddenly turning to ash was a nice surprise, as was the doppelganger of Cusack's hijacking his webcam conversation and telling his wife to come to the room. And the ending scene where Cusack sets the room on fire while laughing hysterically as everything burned in flames around him was fucking sweet. The movie has its moments, but don't expect anything incredible. It's not good. It's not bad. It's simply okay.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Donnie Darko
I saw this movie for the first time last night and all I have to say is "holy shit". This is a very, very intelligent movie, brilliant in complexity, plot and absolutely everything. It's a rare joy when you encounter a movie that is truly unique from every other piece of media floating out there. I don't even know how to open this review, the movie is quite hard to describe and wrap your head around. The best way to describe it is the darker moments of The OC meets the most intriguing, unforeseen moments of sci-fi series like Firefly and LOST. Throw in a protagonist so twisted and dark he rivals Dexter's title character for the most disturbed character in any fictional dimension, and you've got one of the best movies of all time. The movie didn't do too well in cinemas 6 years ago, but has since become a cult classic and become one of the most critically praised and highly-regarded films of all time. To give you an idea, Donnie Darko ranks ninth in FilmFour's 50 Films to See Before You Die and 5th in a "greatest films of all time" survey conducted by ABC.
The main plot of the movie centres around a delusional high-school student named Donnie Darko in the town of Middlesex, who is visited by a demonic rabbit with (to quote the back of the DVD) "eerie visiona of the past, and deadly predictions for the future". Donnie has a balanced, supportive family with his parents and 2 sisters (one elder and one younger) and regularly attends meetings with his therapist who prescribes him medication and listens to his darkest thoughts and feelings which he hides away from everyone else. He also has the unfortunate tendency to sleepwalk, which we find out in the opening scene where we find him asleep, sprawled out on a golf course miles away from his house. This is rather fortunate occurence for Donnie and his family, as an airline engine flew from out of nowhere and completely demolished his bedroom whilst he was safely dozing on the golf course.
You have thrills and twists in the form of questions like who is Frank the demonic bunny, why is he making Donnie do "bad things" such as flooding the school and setting fire to a child pornographer's house, and the most exciting question of all, where in the hell is the film heading to next? There's also an unlikely romance between Donnie and the new girl Gretchen who's mother was stabbed 4 times by her mentally unstable stepdad. Donnie feels somewhat connected to her due to the fact she is damaged and twisted to an extent, although definitely not half as much as Donnie. And then there's the enigmatic paranormal plot device of time travel, and the old woman who checks her mailbox every minute, and the emotionless, sexy teacher (played by Drew Barrymore. OH YEAH!1), and Donnie's smurf-boning friends, and Donnie's ignorant, annoying gym teacher, and bubbles coming out of peoples' chests, and the antichrist trying to brainwash the students of the school, and the kind of dark, cynical wit usually only reserved for Chuck Palahnuik novels and the most twisted episodes of Dexter. What more could you want in a movie?
This thrilling, dramatic, sci-fi, darkly-humourous psychological thriller is indescribably brilliant. Its intriguing that I found 2 truly unique, compelling, incredible movies that are truly different from every other television show or movie in existence in the space of just 2 days. Alpha Dog and Donnie Darko should definitely be on anyone's list of "movies to see before you die". Not a boring moment in either one. Some of the best minutes of your life will be spent watching these 2 movies, and I don't care if that sounds lame, it couldn't be any closer to the fucking truth. Check these out as soon as you get the chance.
The main plot of the movie centres around a delusional high-school student named Donnie Darko in the town of Middlesex, who is visited by a demonic rabbit with (to quote the back of the DVD) "eerie visiona of the past, and deadly predictions for the future". Donnie has a balanced, supportive family with his parents and 2 sisters (one elder and one younger) and regularly attends meetings with his therapist who prescribes him medication and listens to his darkest thoughts and feelings which he hides away from everyone else. He also has the unfortunate tendency to sleepwalk, which we find out in the opening scene where we find him asleep, sprawled out on a golf course miles away from his house. This is rather fortunate occurence for Donnie and his family, as an airline engine flew from out of nowhere and completely demolished his bedroom whilst he was safely dozing on the golf course.
You have thrills and twists in the form of questions like who is Frank the demonic bunny, why is he making Donnie do "bad things" such as flooding the school and setting fire to a child pornographer's house, and the most exciting question of all, where in the hell is the film heading to next? There's also an unlikely romance between Donnie and the new girl Gretchen who's mother was stabbed 4 times by her mentally unstable stepdad. Donnie feels somewhat connected to her due to the fact she is damaged and twisted to an extent, although definitely not half as much as Donnie. And then there's the enigmatic paranormal plot device of time travel, and the old woman who checks her mailbox every minute, and the emotionless, sexy teacher (played by Drew Barrymore. OH YEAH!1), and Donnie's smurf-boning friends, and Donnie's ignorant, annoying gym teacher, and bubbles coming out of peoples' chests, and the antichrist trying to brainwash the students of the school, and the kind of dark, cynical wit usually only reserved for Chuck Palahnuik novels and the most twisted episodes of Dexter. What more could you want in a movie?
This thrilling, dramatic, sci-fi, darkly-humourous psychological thriller is indescribably brilliant. Its intriguing that I found 2 truly unique, compelling, incredible movies that are truly different from every other television show or movie in existence in the space of just 2 days. Alpha Dog and Donnie Darko should definitely be on anyone's list of "movies to see before you die". Not a boring moment in either one. Some of the best minutes of your life will be spent watching these 2 movies, and I don't care if that sounds lame, it couldn't be any closer to the fucking truth. Check these out as soon as you get the chance.
Blade
Whew. So I just woke up from a movie marathon at a mate's place. It's about damn time I got out of the house, I haven't done a single thing outdoors since the summer started besides work. So anyway, Blade. This movie is close to 10 years old now. After seeing Underworld and its sequel I set my sights on the other vampire trilogy of movies, Blade. Unfortunately, this movie doesn't come close to Underworld at all. To sum it up, its a fairly hollow film with lots of action but not much substance. The storyline is very generic, the characters are one-sided and the whole thing is boring as hell. I started to nod off at least 8 or 9 times due to the fact that compared to previous movies I watched last night, this one just didn't come close.
The movie incorporated several unique takes on vampirism into the picture, and had some smart ideas such as using a serum of silver-nitrate and garlic as a weapon, along with the concept of what would happen to a pregnant woman who got bitten by a vampire right as she starts to go into labour. She ended up popping out Blade (or Eric, as mummy dearest calls him), a half-human half-vampire hybrid with the strengths of both worlds and the weaknesses of none. This means Blade contains the strength, speed and thirst of blood of a vamp, but is able to walk in sunlight, withstand silver/garlic/stakes and generally kick our fangy friends' asses without working up a sweat.
As cool as it all sounds, in reality it produced a very boring movie. The only highlights were the fight scene at the vampire nightclub with blood spraying down from sprinklers in the ceiling, and the fight scene at the end where Blade went all psycho on any vamp within a 10,000 mile radius. The middle 90 minutes of the movie was a bunch of generic, boring, predictable, cheesy crap. The whole thing was just a very tired plot with an ensemble of predictable, bland characters that you've seen a million times before in any action movie. Boy loses parents due to enemy, old man takes boy in and raises him to use his "evil" powers for "good", boy meets girl, boy saves girl, old man dies by enemy's hand when boy is nowhere in sight, boy reaches old man right before he dies and exchanges cliche'd dialogue, enemy kidnaps girl, boy goes all kickass on enemy and henchman, all's well that ends well. Bla. Makes me bored just thinking about it all again.
Wesley Snipes did a good job with the absolutely horrific script he had to work with, but the main problem with the movie is that the whole thing has been done a million times before, only this one has vampires instead of mutant aliens from another dimension or Italian mobsters who orphaned the protagonist. The vampires were more interesting than the heroes, it's all just so cliche'd and horrible. The lone hero who has suffered great loss, the distressed chick who gets saved by hero, the old man who raised lone hero who kicks it to make room for lone hero to be more of a lone hero, and the main villain who wants lone hero to either join him or die. Ahhhh. I'm undecided as to whether or not to bother giving the sequels a chance, in the end I probably will as I always love to see the sexy Jessica Biel and she plays the main female lead in the 3rd installment in this lacklustre series.
Blade has it's moments, and spun a truly unique take on vampirism that has no doubt inspired other movies and television series in the genre, but in the end it fails to deliver and puts you to sleep with an uninspired plot and scenes which aren't enthralling or remotely interesting at all. Maybe the sequels are better, but this movie simply isn't good. Go watch the Underworld series and give this one a miss.
The movie incorporated several unique takes on vampirism into the picture, and had some smart ideas such as using a serum of silver-nitrate and garlic as a weapon, along with the concept of what would happen to a pregnant woman who got bitten by a vampire right as she starts to go into labour. She ended up popping out Blade (or Eric, as mummy dearest calls him), a half-human half-vampire hybrid with the strengths of both worlds and the weaknesses of none. This means Blade contains the strength, speed and thirst of blood of a vamp, but is able to walk in sunlight, withstand silver/garlic/stakes and generally kick our fangy friends' asses without working up a sweat.
As cool as it all sounds, in reality it produced a very boring movie. The only highlights were the fight scene at the vampire nightclub with blood spraying down from sprinklers in the ceiling, and the fight scene at the end where Blade went all psycho on any vamp within a 10,000 mile radius. The middle 90 minutes of the movie was a bunch of generic, boring, predictable, cheesy crap. The whole thing was just a very tired plot with an ensemble of predictable, bland characters that you've seen a million times before in any action movie. Boy loses parents due to enemy, old man takes boy in and raises him to use his "evil" powers for "good", boy meets girl, boy saves girl, old man dies by enemy's hand when boy is nowhere in sight, boy reaches old man right before he dies and exchanges cliche'd dialogue, enemy kidnaps girl, boy goes all kickass on enemy and henchman, all's well that ends well. Bla. Makes me bored just thinking about it all again.
Wesley Snipes did a good job with the absolutely horrific script he had to work with, but the main problem with the movie is that the whole thing has been done a million times before, only this one has vampires instead of mutant aliens from another dimension or Italian mobsters who orphaned the protagonist. The vampires were more interesting than the heroes, it's all just so cliche'd and horrible. The lone hero who has suffered great loss, the distressed chick who gets saved by hero, the old man who raised lone hero who kicks it to make room for lone hero to be more of a lone hero, and the main villain who wants lone hero to either join him or die. Ahhhh. I'm undecided as to whether or not to bother giving the sequels a chance, in the end I probably will as I always love to see the sexy Jessica Biel and she plays the main female lead in the 3rd installment in this lacklustre series.
Blade has it's moments, and spun a truly unique take on vampirism that has no doubt inspired other movies and television series in the genre, but in the end it fails to deliver and puts you to sleep with an uninspired plot and scenes which aren't enthralling or remotely interesting at all. Maybe the sequels are better, but this movie simply isn't good. Go watch the Underworld series and give this one a miss.
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Alpha Dog
Wow. That's all I have to say after watching this movie. This has got to be one of the best movies I've seen in my life, and believe me, I've seen way more than the average person has. I rented this movie on a whim. I was looking for anything dark and twisted to match my internal mood. At the time, I was depressed and feeling somewhat suicidal, so I felt like a good action movie or 2 with some pizzas would cheer me up. Of course, seeing some pathetic Will Ferrell comedy is more depressing than uplifting as that guy simply makes horrible movies, so I went with the action route. One of the movies I rented was Alpha Dog.
There were 3 main reasons I chose it without having a clue what it was about. i) It stars Bruce Willis and Justin Timberlake ii) its rated MA15+ and contains (according to the cover) "Strong violence, strong coarse language, strong sex scenes, sexual references, strong drug use". That more or less covered everything I felt like watching at the moment, so it was the perfect fit. And iii) I am still suffering from Dexter/Oz withdrawal. The 2 best shows on television that I haven't watched the complete series of yet. No Dexter for another 9 months, and I can't watch Oz because seasons 4-6 haven't been released on DVD in Australia. That's enough to drive anyone mad, especially when torrents are slow as shite and only download 1 episode every 3 days. That's how pathetic its speed is, on average the download speed is 0.5kb/s.
This movie is the exact thing I wanted to watch, and the exact thing that I needed, right at this moment in my life. I wanted something with rivalry, something with violence, something with gang wars, something with sex, something dark and gritty to vacate the loss of Dexter and Oz. And this movie delivered all that and then some. It was funny when it wanted to be, it was believable, it was compelling, it was entertaining, it was sexy, it was dark, it was fun, and it was very dramatic and bittersweet towards the end. Absolutely incredible, everything I like in a series or movie all rolled into one.
The movie's actually based on the real-life kidnapping and murder of a 15 year old kid who's brother owed his drug dealer $1200. What's more, the movie is said to be 95% correct. The lawyer who is residing over the case at the moment actually showed the movie's staff original source documents and evidence to help them in the making of the movie. He later got sacked because of it, but hey, he'd be a very rich and happy man. Back to the plot, the movie concentrates on 2 "families". The first is the content, middle-class suburban family of the Mazurskys. The father and mother of the family are your ordinary concerned, anxious, loving parents. Their eldest son Jake is the one who owes the drug dealer $1200 and their youngest son Zack is the one who got kidnapped, and later murdered, by his brother's ex-friends and drug buddies. The second "family" of sorts isn't a real family, but more a gang of bro's and ho's who hook up together and live the life of party all night, sleep all day. These are the street kids who run through drugs, alcohol and money like water, but they all have substantially large wads of cash (either from their clueless parents, or their own illegal activities like drug trafficking.)
The leader of family #2, Johnny, who is also Jake's drug dealer, is the big cheese who everyone has a mutual respect for. After getting into a scuffle with Jake when he demands his money that Jake doesn't have, they pull juvenile pranks on each other for revenge. However, these juvenile pranks escalate larger and larger, starting with Johnny calling Jake's boss and telling him that he's been taking drugs again and violating his parole. After getting fired, Jake retaliates by breaking into Johnny's house with a couple of his homeboys and taking a shit in the middle of his house. Oh, and he also stole his TV and broke a couple of his windows. Johnny and his buds respond by kidnapping Jake's younger brother Zack as he's walking down the street.
At first, Zack is confused and frightened, but eventually he forms a bond with many of Johnny's crew, in particular Frankee (Justin Timberlake). The next 80 minute chunk of the movie follows Johnny's boys and Zack hanging out and doing bro-stuff together like smoking, drinking, playing X-box and partying. Zack is having the time of his life and admits he's never been happier than he is right now, and he even goes skinny dipping in a pool with 2 sexy, blonde chicks who find the fact that he's been "stolen" hot. Meanwhile, while Zack is living the life, making out with that hot chick who played Lilly Kane on Veronica Mars and partying with his brother's nemeses, his parents are worried sick. After 3 days of Zack's absence, his family are very upset and have called in the police and every family relative within a million miles to come to their house and help comfort them. Meanwhile, Jake has lost it and loses himself in a self-destructive rage. Man, this guy really kicks some ass when he's mad, and he does it with style. He bursts into a party where some of Johnny's mates are hanging and he completely tears apart every single person in the room, demolishing every piece of furniture and body in his way. After kicking everyone's ass into the ground, he yells "If anyone sees that little bitch Johnny Truelove, tell them Jake Mazursky is looking for him".
Unfortunately, the moment we all knew was coming arrives and Johnny gets cold feet. He calls a lawyer and finds out they could be facing jail for life if the police caught them and found out their role in the kidnapping. He offers Frankee $2500 to kill Zack, but Frankee refuses and tells him he's out of his mind. Johnny makes like he was joking, but then he goes to another bud of his named Elvis and gets him to perform the deed instead. Elvis explains to Frankee they "gotta do what they gotta do" because they're all facing life in jail as a result of everything that has happened. In a heart-wrenching series of events, the kid gets offed, each member of Johnny's gang eventually gets arrested and jailed, and Zack's family is never the same. Although, we never do find out what the hell happened to Jake. After that kickass scene in the club, I really expected him to be the one who tracked down Johnny and tore him apart. But that club scene was the last we ever saw of him. That kind of sucks. But anyway.
On a more uplifting note, the chicks in this movie were really fucking hot. Olivia Wilde, Amber Heard, and Amanda Seyfried, each from some of the hottest teen dramas on television (The OC, Hidden Palms and Veronica Mars respectively). And, best of all, we got to see all of these chicks topless at some point throughout the movie. Also, Vincent Kartheiser who plays Connor on Angel somehow had an appearance as some guy named Pick, but I didn't notice him at all. I sure as hell would remember seeing him in there and shouting "Connor", it must have been a minor role or something because I sure as hell don't remember seeing him in there. I'll have to watch it again.
Absolutely incredible fucking movie. Best one I've seen in a long time, no doubt, and probably makes my top 5 movies of all time in terms of uniqueness and brilliance. It's a bizarre combination of the parties, wild nights and teenage experiences of The OC meets the darkness, rivalry, violence and intelligence of Oz, and it works beautifully. Go watch it, you won't regret it. It's really fucking good.
There were 3 main reasons I chose it without having a clue what it was about. i) It stars Bruce Willis and Justin Timberlake ii) its rated MA15+ and contains (according to the cover) "Strong violence, strong coarse language, strong sex scenes, sexual references, strong drug use". That more or less covered everything I felt like watching at the moment, so it was the perfect fit. And iii) I am still suffering from Dexter/Oz withdrawal. The 2 best shows on television that I haven't watched the complete series of yet. No Dexter for another 9 months, and I can't watch Oz because seasons 4-6 haven't been released on DVD in Australia. That's enough to drive anyone mad, especially when torrents are slow as shite and only download 1 episode every 3 days. That's how pathetic its speed is, on average the download speed is 0.5kb/s.
This movie is the exact thing I wanted to watch, and the exact thing that I needed, right at this moment in my life. I wanted something with rivalry, something with violence, something with gang wars, something with sex, something dark and gritty to vacate the loss of Dexter and Oz. And this movie delivered all that and then some. It was funny when it wanted to be, it was believable, it was compelling, it was entertaining, it was sexy, it was dark, it was fun, and it was very dramatic and bittersweet towards the end. Absolutely incredible, everything I like in a series or movie all rolled into one.
The movie's actually based on the real-life kidnapping and murder of a 15 year old kid who's brother owed his drug dealer $1200. What's more, the movie is said to be 95% correct. The lawyer who is residing over the case at the moment actually showed the movie's staff original source documents and evidence to help them in the making of the movie. He later got sacked because of it, but hey, he'd be a very rich and happy man. Back to the plot, the movie concentrates on 2 "families". The first is the content, middle-class suburban family of the Mazurskys. The father and mother of the family are your ordinary concerned, anxious, loving parents. Their eldest son Jake is the one who owes the drug dealer $1200 and their youngest son Zack is the one who got kidnapped, and later murdered, by his brother's ex-friends and drug buddies. The second "family" of sorts isn't a real family, but more a gang of bro's and ho's who hook up together and live the life of party all night, sleep all day. These are the street kids who run through drugs, alcohol and money like water, but they all have substantially large wads of cash (either from their clueless parents, or their own illegal activities like drug trafficking.)
The leader of family #2, Johnny, who is also Jake's drug dealer, is the big cheese who everyone has a mutual respect for. After getting into a scuffle with Jake when he demands his money that Jake doesn't have, they pull juvenile pranks on each other for revenge. However, these juvenile pranks escalate larger and larger, starting with Johnny calling Jake's boss and telling him that he's been taking drugs again and violating his parole. After getting fired, Jake retaliates by breaking into Johnny's house with a couple of his homeboys and taking a shit in the middle of his house. Oh, and he also stole his TV and broke a couple of his windows. Johnny and his buds respond by kidnapping Jake's younger brother Zack as he's walking down the street.
At first, Zack is confused and frightened, but eventually he forms a bond with many of Johnny's crew, in particular Frankee (Justin Timberlake). The next 80 minute chunk of the movie follows Johnny's boys and Zack hanging out and doing bro-stuff together like smoking, drinking, playing X-box and partying. Zack is having the time of his life and admits he's never been happier than he is right now, and he even goes skinny dipping in a pool with 2 sexy, blonde chicks who find the fact that he's been "stolen" hot. Meanwhile, while Zack is living the life, making out with that hot chick who played Lilly Kane on Veronica Mars and partying with his brother's nemeses, his parents are worried sick. After 3 days of Zack's absence, his family are very upset and have called in the police and every family relative within a million miles to come to their house and help comfort them. Meanwhile, Jake has lost it and loses himself in a self-destructive rage. Man, this guy really kicks some ass when he's mad, and he does it with style. He bursts into a party where some of Johnny's mates are hanging and he completely tears apart every single person in the room, demolishing every piece of furniture and body in his way. After kicking everyone's ass into the ground, he yells "If anyone sees that little bitch Johnny Truelove, tell them Jake Mazursky is looking for him".
Unfortunately, the moment we all knew was coming arrives and Johnny gets cold feet. He calls a lawyer and finds out they could be facing jail for life if the police caught them and found out their role in the kidnapping. He offers Frankee $2500 to kill Zack, but Frankee refuses and tells him he's out of his mind. Johnny makes like he was joking, but then he goes to another bud of his named Elvis and gets him to perform the deed instead. Elvis explains to Frankee they "gotta do what they gotta do" because they're all facing life in jail as a result of everything that has happened. In a heart-wrenching series of events, the kid gets offed, each member of Johnny's gang eventually gets arrested and jailed, and Zack's family is never the same. Although, we never do find out what the hell happened to Jake. After that kickass scene in the club, I really expected him to be the one who tracked down Johnny and tore him apart. But that club scene was the last we ever saw of him. That kind of sucks. But anyway.
On a more uplifting note, the chicks in this movie were really fucking hot. Olivia Wilde, Amber Heard, and Amanda Seyfried, each from some of the hottest teen dramas on television (The OC, Hidden Palms and Veronica Mars respectively). And, best of all, we got to see all of these chicks topless at some point throughout the movie. Also, Vincent Kartheiser who plays Connor on Angel somehow had an appearance as some guy named Pick, but I didn't notice him at all. I sure as hell would remember seeing him in there and shouting "Connor", it must have been a minor role or something because I sure as hell don't remember seeing him in there. I'll have to watch it again.
Absolutely incredible fucking movie. Best one I've seen in a long time, no doubt, and probably makes my top 5 movies of all time in terms of uniqueness and brilliance. It's a bizarre combination of the parties, wild nights and teenage experiences of The OC meets the darkness, rivalry, violence and intelligence of Oz, and it works beautifully. Go watch it, you won't regret it. It's really fucking good.
Friday, December 14, 2007
Journeyman
At first, I completely and utterly despised this show. I even went as far as hailing the pilot as the "worst pilot ever". Maybe I was just annoyed because I had watched the pilots of Bionic Woman, Gossip Girl and Pushing Daisies all in a row (if you didn't realise, that is by no means a good thing, considering those 3 shows are awful) and this pilot was no better than any of those. Since then, however, the series has warmed to me a considerable amount and has climbed as far as becoming my favourite new show of the season. Oh, and that theme music kicks ass so much. It's the best television theme music I've ever heard. Absolutely brilliant. I should download it and put it on repeat for like a year.
The series chronicles the time-traveling adventures of Dan Vasser, a journalist who is married and has a 7-year old son. Supporting characters include Dan's wife Katie, Dan's brother Jack, Dan's boss Hugh and Dan's ex-fiance who "died" in a plane crash in 1997. We later discover she didn't die, she is rather a time-traveler like Dan who lives in the year 1948 and goes on "missions" like Dan to help others out and, in some cases, change their lives for the better.
There is no more compelling a show than Journeyman right now. It got off to a very slow start, but since then every episode has gotten better and better, and by episode 5 I was left wanting more. It's a very intelligent show, with intelligent humour, intelligent wit and intelligent writing. The relationships between the characters are very real and believable, and moments that we all knew were coming such as Dan's son Zack witnessing his father magically disappear in a ripple of blue vapour and Jack Vasser finally coming around to believe what Dan is saying, that should be cheesy and foreseen, are all the more (for lack of a better word) "magic". This show sucks you in like no other and you truly feel as if you are with Dan as he travels through time, touching other's lives for the better.
The show knows just the right time to begin a multi-episode arc, and just the right time to end it. The way they finished the plot with the rogue FBI agent who wanted to exploit Dan and his abilities for his own greed by tying it in with the other plot with the serial kidnapper who shot Dan was absolutely fantastic. And Dan traveling back to discover that the kidnapper was abused and shut in as a kid by his dad was absolutely brilliant. All of this happened in the episode "Blowback", and that episode secured this show into my top 10 favourites of all time. Really, if you haven't seen this show yet, all of this will just be incoherent babble for you. The best thing you can do is give it a shot. Watch the episodes online, download them from a blog site, do whatever you want. This really is a fantastic show, and its a shame it's been axed as it missed the December 11 deadline to get picked up for a full season. IMO, it definitely deserved a full season over Chuck and most of the crap that's on television right now.
What works: Intelligent, fun, witty and exciting, this show is a must to watch. I suggest starting from Episode 3 as the first 2 were rather mediocre. You won't see a show as exciting or compelling as this for a long time.
What doesn't: First 2 episodes were boring and treated the viewers like we were goldfish. Because of this, it lost 3 million viewers right before the 3rd episode, which is just when things started to get good. A shame, really.
File this next to Tru Calling and Traveler in the "brilliant shows that got axed before their time" section. Maybe the fan's campaign of sending "Rice-a-Roni's" to NBC will work a la Jericho, but it's not likely. Here's to looking forward to the next brilliant show that meets its demise early.
The series chronicles the time-traveling adventures of Dan Vasser, a journalist who is married and has a 7-year old son. Supporting characters include Dan's wife Katie, Dan's brother Jack, Dan's boss Hugh and Dan's ex-fiance who "died" in a plane crash in 1997. We later discover she didn't die, she is rather a time-traveler like Dan who lives in the year 1948 and goes on "missions" like Dan to help others out and, in some cases, change their lives for the better.
There is no more compelling a show than Journeyman right now. It got off to a very slow start, but since then every episode has gotten better and better, and by episode 5 I was left wanting more. It's a very intelligent show, with intelligent humour, intelligent wit and intelligent writing. The relationships between the characters are very real and believable, and moments that we all knew were coming such as Dan's son Zack witnessing his father magically disappear in a ripple of blue vapour and Jack Vasser finally coming around to believe what Dan is saying, that should be cheesy and foreseen, are all the more (for lack of a better word) "magic". This show sucks you in like no other and you truly feel as if you are with Dan as he travels through time, touching other's lives for the better.
The show knows just the right time to begin a multi-episode arc, and just the right time to end it. The way they finished the plot with the rogue FBI agent who wanted to exploit Dan and his abilities for his own greed by tying it in with the other plot with the serial kidnapper who shot Dan was absolutely fantastic. And Dan traveling back to discover that the kidnapper was abused and shut in as a kid by his dad was absolutely brilliant. All of this happened in the episode "Blowback", and that episode secured this show into my top 10 favourites of all time. Really, if you haven't seen this show yet, all of this will just be incoherent babble for you. The best thing you can do is give it a shot. Watch the episodes online, download them from a blog site, do whatever you want. This really is a fantastic show, and its a shame it's been axed as it missed the December 11 deadline to get picked up for a full season. IMO, it definitely deserved a full season over Chuck and most of the crap that's on television right now.
What works: Intelligent, fun, witty and exciting, this show is a must to watch. I suggest starting from Episode 3 as the first 2 were rather mediocre. You won't see a show as exciting or compelling as this for a long time.
What doesn't: First 2 episodes were boring and treated the viewers like we were goldfish. Because of this, it lost 3 million viewers right before the 3rd episode, which is just when things started to get good. A shame, really.
File this next to Tru Calling and Traveler in the "brilliant shows that got axed before their time" section. Maybe the fan's campaign of sending "Rice-a-Roni's" to NBC will work a la Jericho, but it's not likely. Here's to looking forward to the next brilliant show that meets its demise early.
Medium
In reviewing this show I'm reminded of an episode of Supernatural in which Sam is developing his psychic powers. Dean asks him "Who do you think is a hotter psychic? Jennifer Love Hewitt, Patricia Arquette or you?" The answer, for me, would be JLH (Heartbreakers-era), although since Ghost Whisperer started she has definitely lost a lot of her hawtness (a lot more baggy old women's clothes, I understand her going the route of "I-am-no-longer-proud-of-my-sexuality", but does she have to do the whole thing with clothes that I would usually see a 90 year old women wear?". Anyway, back on topic. Medium. This show's had 3 seasons so far, but I never really became a fan. It just isn't that interesting for me to watch more than once every couple of weeks/months, and yesterday I did just that when a rerun came on Channel 10.
The plot of most episodes in this series, save for specials or season finals/openers is a psychic named Allison Dubois solving crimes by having futuristic visions in her dreams, talking with dead people and occasionally reading people's minds. Allison will have a cryptic vision, and then her co-workers and her will work together to find out what it means in relation to solving the crime. After a few dead ends here and there, they'll stumble upon the truth, and the case is solved. There are often subplots involving Allison's 3 daughters (who are also gifted psychics) and her supportive husband Joe, whose role is usually reserved for encouraging Allison and playing the kind husband.
What works: Interesting concept, Patricia Arquette plays a strong female lead, exciting and interesting when it wants to be
What doesn't: In the end, its just another cop show, with the novelty of a psychic as the protagonist. It's like Psych, only minus the comedy, good writing and the fact that Allison is actually a real psychic. The show wouldn't hurt to undergo a few more changes to it's formulaic episode structure now and then either, rather than "Allison has vision, Allison works out vision, Allison solves crime" every time.
Overall, it's an average show. Not bad, not great, just average. The only real problem I have with it is the show focuses too much on the conflict, and not enough on the resolution of the case. Usually there's only 1 or 2 minutes at the end of the episode reserved to wrap things up. As a result of this, the viewer is left without a real closure, and walks away feeling nonplussed. I'm not saying this show should have overly sappy, "everyone-has-become-stronger-as-a-result-of-this-trying-experience" ending every episode a la Ghost Whisperer with everyone crying and smiling as the departed soul vanishes into the light, but it wouldn't hurt for the ending to be something more than "okay everyone, case closed, let's discuss between ourselves the aftermath of the case, often 1 or 2 months after everything has happened, but we won't actually show any of the characters going through the healing process, as that overstretches our 2-minute resolution allowance. "
An example of this is the episode where a crazed employee who worked with Joe at his workplace got fired and as a result took everyone in the board meeting hostage. Eventually, Joe got shot, his co-worker and boss got riddled with bullets, and the crazy guy who got fired blew himself up. Instead of a proper resolution, the show went from crazy dude blowing his head open one scene to the 2-minute-crappy-resolution the next. This involved Joe saying to Allison "Well, its been 2 months, but that bullet wound has healed and my arm is finally better. Oh, and Aaron's funeral's next week, I probably won't go because it would be depressing, but he was a nice guy" before Allison kisses him and the episode closes. Endings like that completely butcher the entire episode, and doesn't exactly scream satisfaction for viewers.
If you can get past the ending of each episode butchering the whole thing, than there's something to like here. In the end, it's worth a watch every now and then, just like a CSI show every once in a while. But for watching on a repeat basis, you'd be better off looking elsewhere.
The plot of most episodes in this series, save for specials or season finals/openers is a psychic named Allison Dubois solving crimes by having futuristic visions in her dreams, talking with dead people and occasionally reading people's minds. Allison will have a cryptic vision, and then her co-workers and her will work together to find out what it means in relation to solving the crime. After a few dead ends here and there, they'll stumble upon the truth, and the case is solved. There are often subplots involving Allison's 3 daughters (who are also gifted psychics) and her supportive husband Joe, whose role is usually reserved for encouraging Allison and playing the kind husband.
What works: Interesting concept, Patricia Arquette plays a strong female lead, exciting and interesting when it wants to be
What doesn't: In the end, its just another cop show, with the novelty of a psychic as the protagonist. It's like Psych, only minus the comedy, good writing and the fact that Allison is actually a real psychic. The show wouldn't hurt to undergo a few more changes to it's formulaic episode structure now and then either, rather than "Allison has vision, Allison works out vision, Allison solves crime" every time.
Overall, it's an average show. Not bad, not great, just average. The only real problem I have with it is the show focuses too much on the conflict, and not enough on the resolution of the case. Usually there's only 1 or 2 minutes at the end of the episode reserved to wrap things up. As a result of this, the viewer is left without a real closure, and walks away feeling nonplussed. I'm not saying this show should have overly sappy, "everyone-has-become-stronger-as-a-result-of-this-trying-experience" ending every episode a la Ghost Whisperer with everyone crying and smiling as the departed soul vanishes into the light, but it wouldn't hurt for the ending to be something more than "okay everyone, case closed, let's discuss between ourselves the aftermath of the case, often 1 or 2 months after everything has happened, but we won't actually show any of the characters going through the healing process, as that overstretches our 2-minute resolution allowance. "
An example of this is the episode where a crazed employee who worked with Joe at his workplace got fired and as a result took everyone in the board meeting hostage. Eventually, Joe got shot, his co-worker and boss got riddled with bullets, and the crazy guy who got fired blew himself up. Instead of a proper resolution, the show went from crazy dude blowing his head open one scene to the 2-minute-crappy-resolution the next. This involved Joe saying to Allison "Well, its been 2 months, but that bullet wound has healed and my arm is finally better. Oh, and Aaron's funeral's next week, I probably won't go because it would be depressing, but he was a nice guy" before Allison kisses him and the episode closes. Endings like that completely butcher the entire episode, and doesn't exactly scream satisfaction for viewers.
If you can get past the ending of each episode butchering the whole thing, than there's something to like here. In the end, it's worth a watch every now and then, just like a CSI show every once in a while. But for watching on a repeat basis, you'd be better off looking elsewhere.
Jericho
So I might be a bit harsh in what I'm about to say about this series. After all, in the past few days, I have watched some great shit. The final 2 Dexter episodes, 3 seasons of Oz, and the mind-blowing two part season-finale of Life. Those 3 shows are no doubt the best television I have watched this year, besides Buffy/Angel and The OC finale. I remember watching this show 2 years ago, the initial batch of 11 episodes back when CBS had the confidence of that Jericho was their post nuclear-apocalypse version of LOST. No matter how much the fans rally behind this show, how much they support it, praise it, love it and try to save it, the plain and simple fact is it simply isn't that good.
In the spirit of giving it another chance now that CBS decided to save it's ass for a 7 episode run for a midseason replacement, I downloaded the remaining first season episodes that I have yet to see. (Channel 10 gave up on the series and never bothered broadcasting it again after it was put on hiatus). Now I remember why I disliked this show in the first place. The worst thing about it is it's so goddamn boring!! This show is essentially the Cane of 2006, i.e. the most boring, lame, annoyingly bland show of the year. Just like Cane, Bionic Woman, and Pushing Daisies, all these series had original concepts and interesting ideas with absolutely horrid execution.
The creators had an entire 22 episodes to give us some answers, any answers, as to how the hell a nuclear apocalypse wiped out close to every major city in various places of the world, but so far we've still got nothing. They've had a couple of storylines with the citizens of Jericho fighting other survivors from neighbouring towns, rogue SWAT teams, plane crash survivors and even had the season finale with the main character's Dad dying in the midst of a war, but no goddamn answers at all. The only person who seems to know anything about the bombs is a black whackjob who thinks he works for the FBI and that the mafia are after him. And this series has so many annoying plotholes its not even funny. The survivors are listening to a Muse song that came out in 2007, when episode 12 is actually set in November 2006?! 2 months after the bombs, right?! Uhhh. The illusion of realism is shattered by stupid little inconsistencies like this, and how convenient that all electricity around the world and all portable batteries got fried, except for the generators that fell from the sky and now power the town. WTF is that?!?!
There are a couple of good moments, like when that gang of rebels stabbed Gracie and took possession of her store and then that kid took revenge by shooting the leader in the chest. That was interesting, but for the most part, its not about the nuclear apocalypse at all. Its all about the stupid little unconvincing romances and love triangles between all the main characters and all the little dramas their town suffers as Daddy Johnson fights and moans at Gray for becoming Mayor whilst dying of a sickness while his sons pork married women and the citizens of the town run amok. Its like friggin Bold and the Beautiful, only disguised as a serialised enigmatic show as a mask for the network and the viewers that the staff and crew of the show put on to avoid getting axed. The obvious truth is that there is no answers, the staff are only in it for the money, and if not, than they'd actually try and put some semblance of effort into this tired, contrived slop of a series to make it even the least bit watchable.
Maybe they'd realised that people started to see through their little charade when viewers lost interest and the network cancelled this hack of a show. At least Days of Our Lives, The Young and the Restless, The Bold and the Beautiful and all these other tasteless, generic, crappy, boring, contrived soap opera dramas know that their work is cheesy, cliche'd, unoriginal, boring slop, and they admit it. They don't try and pretend they're something they're not, unlike this show which claims all this and all that, but when it comes down to it, it just fails to deliver.
There never has been any pre-planned explanation for the nuclear apocalypse aspect of the show at all, it's all made up as it goes along. This show sucks so much. It's not worth your time. The only reason the network renewed it was so the stupid little fanatics would stop getting their knickers in a knot and bombarding the CBS offices with truckloads of "nuts". So, their solution? Raise it back for 1/3 of the amount of episodes they had last time, while shafting it to the 10pm slot on a Tuesday night. Hey, its no big loss, as long as those friggin nuts stop coming in, right??
Meanwhile, other shows with original premises that actually put time and effort into their episodes, storylines and characters to offer something unique amongst all the cop, hospital and reality shows that bombard television right now get axed after 1 or 2 seasons. This show is the same, but it establishes itself with horrid execution. I'm probably just testy about Journeyman getting axed, but it's the same damn thing. Journeyman, Dark Angel, Tru Calling, Firefly, Traveler, Hidden Palms, Drive, Day Break...all these series are a million times better than this crap, and all never made it past 1 or 2 seasons. But this series resurrected from the dead whilst these other shows with even better concepts and far superior execution stay buried and six feet under. WHY?!?!?!
The game of the creators is to keep the charade of the nuclear apocalypse plot going for as long as possible whilst they can play boy meets girl in a town with more cliche'd romances, dramas and storylines than you can poke a stick at while the mindless drones that actually deem this dribble as watchable get excited and speculate on forums what the morse code of the title sequence of the latest episode means and how everything falls into place in this messy, jumbled television series.
What works: Interesting concept, 1 scene in every 50 is interesting and lives up to the hype
What doesn't: Everything else.
This show sucks. Next.
In the spirit of giving it another chance now that CBS decided to save it's ass for a 7 episode run for a midseason replacement, I downloaded the remaining first season episodes that I have yet to see. (Channel 10 gave up on the series and never bothered broadcasting it again after it was put on hiatus). Now I remember why I disliked this show in the first place. The worst thing about it is it's so goddamn boring!! This show is essentially the Cane of 2006, i.e. the most boring, lame, annoyingly bland show of the year. Just like Cane, Bionic Woman, and Pushing Daisies, all these series had original concepts and interesting ideas with absolutely horrid execution.
The creators had an entire 22 episodes to give us some answers, any answers, as to how the hell a nuclear apocalypse wiped out close to every major city in various places of the world, but so far we've still got nothing. They've had a couple of storylines with the citizens of Jericho fighting other survivors from neighbouring towns, rogue SWAT teams, plane crash survivors and even had the season finale with the main character's Dad dying in the midst of a war, but no goddamn answers at all. The only person who seems to know anything about the bombs is a black whackjob who thinks he works for the FBI and that the mafia are after him. And this series has so many annoying plotholes its not even funny. The survivors are listening to a Muse song that came out in 2007, when episode 12 is actually set in November 2006?! 2 months after the bombs, right?! Uhhh. The illusion of realism is shattered by stupid little inconsistencies like this, and how convenient that all electricity around the world and all portable batteries got fried, except for the generators that fell from the sky and now power the town. WTF is that?!?!
There are a couple of good moments, like when that gang of rebels stabbed Gracie and took possession of her store and then that kid took revenge by shooting the leader in the chest. That was interesting, but for the most part, its not about the nuclear apocalypse at all. Its all about the stupid little unconvincing romances and love triangles between all the main characters and all the little dramas their town suffers as Daddy Johnson fights and moans at Gray for becoming Mayor whilst dying of a sickness while his sons pork married women and the citizens of the town run amok. Its like friggin Bold and the Beautiful, only disguised as a serialised enigmatic show as a mask for the network and the viewers that the staff and crew of the show put on to avoid getting axed. The obvious truth is that there is no answers, the staff are only in it for the money, and if not, than they'd actually try and put some semblance of effort into this tired, contrived slop of a series to make it even the least bit watchable.
Maybe they'd realised that people started to see through their little charade when viewers lost interest and the network cancelled this hack of a show. At least Days of Our Lives, The Young and the Restless, The Bold and the Beautiful and all these other tasteless, generic, crappy, boring, contrived soap opera dramas know that their work is cheesy, cliche'd, unoriginal, boring slop, and they admit it. They don't try and pretend they're something they're not, unlike this show which claims all this and all that, but when it comes down to it, it just fails to deliver.
There never has been any pre-planned explanation for the nuclear apocalypse aspect of the show at all, it's all made up as it goes along. This show sucks so much. It's not worth your time. The only reason the network renewed it was so the stupid little fanatics would stop getting their knickers in a knot and bombarding the CBS offices with truckloads of "nuts". So, their solution? Raise it back for 1/3 of the amount of episodes they had last time, while shafting it to the 10pm slot on a Tuesday night. Hey, its no big loss, as long as those friggin nuts stop coming in, right??
Meanwhile, other shows with original premises that actually put time and effort into their episodes, storylines and characters to offer something unique amongst all the cop, hospital and reality shows that bombard television right now get axed after 1 or 2 seasons. This show is the same, but it establishes itself with horrid execution. I'm probably just testy about Journeyman getting axed, but it's the same damn thing. Journeyman, Dark Angel, Tru Calling, Firefly, Traveler, Hidden Palms, Drive, Day Break...all these series are a million times better than this crap, and all never made it past 1 or 2 seasons. But this series resurrected from the dead whilst these other shows with even better concepts and far superior execution stay buried and six feet under. WHY?!?!?!
The game of the creators is to keep the charade of the nuclear apocalypse plot going for as long as possible whilst they can play boy meets girl in a town with more cliche'd romances, dramas and storylines than you can poke a stick at while the mindless drones that actually deem this dribble as watchable get excited and speculate on forums what the morse code of the title sequence of the latest episode means and how everything falls into place in this messy, jumbled television series.
What works: Interesting concept, 1 scene in every 50 is interesting and lives up to the hype
What doesn't: Everything else.
This show sucks. Next.
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